Change can happen, and God does hear you.

I was once a man of terrible lust. I hated it so much, and I prayed to God to help me get rid of it. Day after day nothing happened. It lasted so long, but I continued to pray out of hope that he would hear me and save me from myself. Finally, he answered me months ago. It wasn't until about a week ago did I realize all this, but my lust has been changed to true love. I thought I knew what true love was always falling for girls but later losing interest in them. Not for there person, but because of their body. What a sick monster I was. He saved me from it by giving me her. Just like the movies when little kids ask their dads, "Daddy, what is love?" He didn't know how to explain it, but he'd tell him, "You'll know it when you find it." ...I found it. God heard me and picked me up, but I was still weak and I've fallen again. Not into lust, but depression. At least this time around I have more faith and I must keep my hope alive. Faith, Hope, and Love. I am full of those three things.

Who am I, and what am I becoming?

I haven't been myself lately. I feel like a bad person...like a bad friend to a particular person, but there's so much going on in my life and so much sadness on my shoulders. I change so much and so many times. I just hope that God has gotten all my prayers and that he helps soon. Hopefully my Lent resolutions will prove to him how much I need him now.



It's tough, life is tough...

...I hate it.

Colon open parenthesis

Why does depression have to exist? It would be so much nicer if it didn't.

But I put it upon myself.

Stupid me.

Pathetic

That's one word that describes me too well...

The Twisted World of Avarice

Been doing some thinking. Some about money, and how this world is so wrapped around it. Avarice and greed; Mammon is too powerful of a demon for us.

My thoughts are clearly stated as this. Money can go f*ck itself. I don't care about it. Too many people make money their life. Without it they feel like they have absolutely nothing, but they are wrong. Money is not life, it is just a sad part of our life. Like what Jesus said, "Return to Caesar what belongs to Caesar, and return to God what belongs God." God does not want to associate himself with money. It is something we created and have to live with now. In fact, people are starving to death and dieing of dehydration, people rob and are robbed, and people even take their own lives all for a worthless pile of paper and metal. I don't like it and I don't like how I even have to rely on it. I'm not broke or in debt or poor or anything, better off than others I'd probably say, but just the thought of money is foolish.

Meh

I was kind of depressed and pissed off today, but I feel a little better now. It's just that I feel a lot of love but not a lot of trust sometimes. I try to be a man of my word and make people trust me, but it just feels like I'm not trusted much. I don't break secrets or anything, it's not my place to tell others what they don't want others to know. It's up to them to tell who they want. But, I don't know I can't read minds.

I need a hug. :(

I've been listening to Within Temptation for a while. I really like the vocals! :)

Oh, and Danielle if you happen to read this, can we talk sometime?

Work in Progress

That's what I am. A work in progress. Finding out who I am. Learning something new everyday. I've had plenty of time to just sit and think. It's what I've been doing a lot lately. Perhaps that's why I tend to post something everyday. Because I write done some of the stuff I think about each day. Today, I've been thinking about my zombie story, a fantasy story thing I've been coming up with and the usual; the confusion in my life about someone. Then I suppose there are other things that don't come to mind right away, but those ones stick out, probably because I was reading The Hunger Games (which I finished!) most of my day today.

Bleh.